I'm bored so I'm playing the part of Letterman tonight

Top ten reasons you should get on a plane and come visit Katie:

10) She'll take you to Del Taco (H loved this place when she came out in 2000. My sister whines because they don't have them in AL)

9) If you like Korean, Filipino,Vietnamese, Chinese, or Japanese food, she has all these places within walking distance of her house and has yet to try them because she won't go alone, but would love to take you!!!

8) The cats could use the company

7) She'll take you to a karaoke bar and you can sit there and laugh at all the drunk people trying to sing songs. It really is pretty comical. If you want to get drunk, she'll laugh at you too because that means she's the designated driver and is mad cause she can't have a drink or two...or three..southern comfort anyone?

6) She'll have an excuse to go out and wear some of her new cute clothes and her new cute shoes

5) She'll introduce you to the wonders of Boba!!!!! What are Tapioca balls anyway?

4) She'll find some fun and exciting things to do in L.A. Hollywood and Highland can only be enjoyed for so long, but if you want to feel like a star and walk where the stars walk at the Academy awards (or see where they film the final American Idol episodes), She'll take you there.

3) She'll take you to Knott's Berry farm and make you toss your cookies on Supreme Scream and Excelerator and then sit you down to a nice chicken dinner at the Chicken dinner place that she has heard is really good but has never been too.

2) After getting you drunk at the Karoke bar, and sick on the rides at Knott's she will then have her cat wake you up to the glorious sounds of his howling meows at 6:45am and then proceed to drag you to Marie Calendar's for the best darn Sunday brunch in the history of the universe.

and the #1 reason to get on a plane and come visit Katie:

1) It's all about Disneyland Baby!!! I haven't been in 2 yrs and I haven't been on Tower of Terror yet!!!!(at DCA even though I went there in May) www.iflyswa.com . Let me know what time you'll be here!!!! LOL

Amazing things

I watched some firemen in action tonight. Calm down ladies...I didn't get to look at any of them. We have a large "excess parking" area at the Church. Fr. has given the local fire dept permission to use it as a heliport if a critical/trauma victim needs to be transported from the scene of the accident to places like County USC and what not. I've heard people say firefighters, paramedic, policemen etc don't really "save lives" it's just a PR stunt they pull and they are all lazy blah blah blah. Watching these guys do their thing was amazing and I was so happy to know that not only was this victim (traffic accident was about 3 blocks from work) being sent from holy ground, but he was in the good hands of these firefighters and paramedics. Thank you Lord for these willing and able hands......(I can't seem to hit enter again)......I had a meeting with our Community Sacramental Evangelists tonight. They are basically the liasons between Marge and I and the parents in regards to the Sacraments. Fr. wants them to try and help reach out to the parents and hopefully we can get them on the right track to evangelization. This is such a brief description of their job, I apologize, but Fr literally created these positions about 2 weeks ago. So they are evolving. I am in the process of working on my prayer for Sunday afternoon. I decided amidst all my talk about faith, I needed to bring in Grace as well, so I am going to talk about that and talk about how the Eucharist is a bridge between us and God. It should be pretty interesting to see how this turns out. I'm making laminated cards for the kids to take home that says "Faith sees the invisible, believes the unbelievable, and receives the impossible" I just love that quote!!!! I'm going to have some mustard seeds in there to tie everything together. I need to sit in my office with my Michael W. Smith CD blasting and just pray like crazy and let God work through me when I write this prayer out. I want to incorporate "Love Can Build a bridge" by the Judd's but I don't want the kids to be tuned out since it's not the most popular song among them. I just have to, again say that I love my job and I am so happy to finally be back doing what God has called me to do!!! Thank you GOD!!! You are so good...all the time!!!!!! (P.S I went shopping again!!! I needed my shower curtain!!! It's sooooo cool I love it!!! It has hawaiian flowers in a cranbery-ish red and a burnt orange and it has surf boards in the same colors and a woody on it....It's so incredibly cool. If I can find a pic of it on WalMarts website I'll post it some how...I don;t know how to do that so we'll see. I also bought 3 movies I am dying to watch. A Walk to Remember...I've NEVER seen this movie and have heard so many good things about it. Princess Bride and When Harry Met Sally. I love love love those movies!!!!! I also bought 2 cards for Fr. One for boss' day and one for Clergy appreciation day which I will have all the kids sign for him. I swore I would not shop anymore.....Bless me Father for I have sinned.......)

A day of gratitude

Last nights post was so dreary!!!! I can't stand it!!! I sound so depressed and I'm not!!! So today is a day of gratitudes:

I am grateful to my God in Heaven for:

1). A clean apartment. I've been so busy, I've let the place go. This morning my darling cat, Marley, woke me up at 6:45am and so I got up and started cleaning. I'm walking around this place just sooooo happy. It smells good, it looks good, it feels good (mopped and vacuumed floors feel good on the feet). Unfotunatley, the vacuum scared the hairballs out of the cats. Poor babies, they really don't like the darn contraption!!!! As I was scrubbing the bathroom Latte kept screaming at me to turn the water on in the bathroom so he could have a drink. He's so cute

2) My paycheck. Being a Youth minister can be a bummer in the pay dept. I'm not saying I am being paid the big dollarino's here or that I deserve more pay but I was just happy to get my first check today. I grateful for the job I have and the opportunity to serve God's beautiful children.

3) Joaquin Pheonix. I have watched Gladiator numerous times and never realized how cute this man is. I can't wait to see Ladder 49!!! And now for some reason blogger won't let me hit enter...so 4) Honeycombs cereal. Do I need to go into detail about how delicious this cereal is? I didn't think so. 5) Joaquin Pheonix...I know I already mentioned him, but he's being such a cutie on Regis and Kelly!!! I want to thumb wrestle him (he thumb wrestled Kelly) and leg wrestle him too!!!! A guy who likes to have fun!!! YAY!!!! 6) Cool weather. It has been so nice the last few days I hope it never heats up again. I love sitting here drinking hot tea and not sweating bullets in my non-central air conditioned home. Hey, I can't complain because I am grateful for my home too!!!! 7) Chinese food and Boba. Though I have yet to find a Boba place worthy of my presence, I love both of these things. I had some really great Chinese food last night. I just need to find a Tapioca Express around here and some great friends to hang out with, then life will really be good. 8) My faith. What more can I say about this? When I thought I was furthest away from God, I turned to him and made a solemn promise "I will never leave you" and everything from my job to my apartment fell into place. God is so good to me. He's still working on me. I know I have lots of healing to do, but he makes it easier when I put all my trust in him. 9) My family. There's nothing better than calling my sister's, having my BIL answer and just talking and laughing and being silly. My BIL can be a pretty serious guy and wants things a certain way when it comes to the kids (I can't talk about Harry Potter or listen to boy band music with them around), but he is so great. He's a great listener, the most logical person I know and very strong in his faith. My sister is my bestest friend. I am so grateful for her life and the mere fact that she is still with us after her aneurysm. God has a great plan for her. Wait, the plan is for her to keep having babies for me to love and spoil!!!!! My brother and SIL have been exceptionally great to me over the last few months. I need to work on showing up at my nephews games though and show them how much I appreciate all they've done........I could add about 100 more things to this list, but I'll save more for later.

Why, Why, Why?

There are just a couple things I've been thinking about the last few days and I just want to know why......I want an answer, however God seems to be taking His sweet time in returning my messages. Oh, believe me I have patience, but I wish He'd hurry already......

1) Why is it that when I can't have something, I want it that much more? Even though the person spells it out as to why I can't have what I want, it makes the desire for that one thing greater? This I don't understand. It goes along with, why do I do dumb things to prevent me from having what I want. Are you confused yet? Good, so am I. I know I have alot of healing to do, but man......

2) Why is it that we women have to work and work and work at looking good all the time, and guys, well most of them, hmmm, one in particular whom I saw this past weekend (insert evil grin here) get better with age? It's not fair, and why do the ones who get better with age make your heart go pitter patter and then we have to go back to "why" question #1 again.

3) Why is the elepahnt man stomping around all the time? Does he have lead feet? Why did he feel the need to pour water on the patio and sweep it onto my patio down below. The man is going to die one of these days as a result of my cats scratching his eyeballs out. If you see a white or orange cat on the 11 o'clock news....please erase from your memory, the fact that I have an orange and a white cat (ok, I'm not going to kill the guy but sheesh he's loud)

4) Why can't I flipping figure out how to make this blog look cool? H has tried to walk me through it but I'm about as computer savvy as an old person learning to get on the computer for the first time. Come on man, I just want it to be cool and interesting here

5) Why can't I build a transporter that works and really transports me to any part of the world I want to go to? I so could have had some great Auntie time today in Alabama followed by a fun night at the Karaoke Bar in Sacramento!!!

6) Why are 22 yr olds catty? I called Shean the other night and his friend (also named Katie) got all mad because she saw my name on his phone, and he answered it. I don't know this girl...why does she hate me???

7) Why are Cookies and Twix so darn good that I want to eat the whole package in one sitting? I love the person who came up with the idea, but my goodness, I'm going to gain 50lbs just from eating them!!!!

8) Why do I sound like a whiner tonight? Probably because I am soooo bored and I want to go out to the movies and I want to see Ladder 49 but I have no one to go with and I refuse to go alone. That sucks, it's like going to dinner alone.....ewwww. Wait Ladder 49 comes out Friday...well still I want to go.

In other news, I met with D & C tonight about our Gathering on Sunday. We're talking about the Gospel reading from Luke 17 5-10. Jesus talks about faith being the size of a mustard seed . We came up with some great ideas for the afternoon and we're all completley excited. I'll post all the details on Sunday after it all happens. It was such a great meeting. We're going to use "Meant to Live" by switchfoot as one of the songs in the beginning of the night. In the reading Jesus talks about a servant doing what he was asked to do by his master and being happy with doing the work. This sparked a "Well there are two themes here and how do they relate to each other" somehow we got the tag line "Suck it up and deal with it". We talked about how having a little faith meant God would entrust you with large tasks. Like the servants we are called to do His work. And we may think we aren't doing much but in the Lords eyes we have been very profitable. So we may not feel like what we are being asked to do by God is "big" or "great" but we need to do it with love and understanding. Sometimes we may have to do meanial tasks. Anyway........we're going to use real mustard seeds and we're going to talk about increasing our faith, and when we loose it how do we find it. We're going to end the afternoon in prayer before the blessed sacrament because it is through Jesus' sacrifice of body and blood that we can increase our faith.....Whew, didn't I say I'd save this for Sunday? Yea, ok I lied. Bless me Father for I have sinned............

So, for the first time almost ever, and I say this because Karen was the first to make a comment....I HAD COMMENTS TO READ. Yes, here we go, doing the 80's white girl dance (blast some Duran Duran now).

Today I dreaded going into work. I knew, just KNEW I would have calls from parents, again wanting to have their kid moved from Tuesday to Weds classes. Sure enough I had 4 calls. I politely told them that I could not make any changes until I confirmed a new teacher for Weds nights. All but one parent was ok with it. One mom almost had a fit and tried to tell me that I don't understand. I do understand that kids are busy with sports, but they need to understand that I will not overwhelm a volunteer teacher with 30+ kids in a class. Not to mention that, IMO, and the opinion of my superiors, Confirmation should come before extra curricular activities. But, who am I? Yes just the youth minister with no children who "doesn't get it".

One of my college kids stopped by my office to say hello. We had a nice little chat. Great guy. He came over from St. John the Baptist in Baldwin Park(about 20 mi East-ish of Los Angeles for those of you who don't know) and my kids really seem to like him. I'm trying to convince him to come on board and stay with us on a regular basis. He seems to know that Lifeteen is going well at SJB, but since it is his home parish, is reluctant to make the move fully to SLR. So, I will pray. God's will be done

I broke down and went shopping again. I needed jeans soooo badly and I decided to go to the mall. YAY I found a pair that fits perfectly, plus I found 3 cute tops as well. No more shopping for me for a while. I know those of you reading this (H, possibly Shean, Karen etc) are probably laughing at that concept. Me not shopping? But I really need to crack down and start focusing on saving. Needless to say the clothes are cute and I can hardly wait to wear them with my new shoes from last night.

I had a bit of an emotional breakdown last night. I hate times like that. There is just alot going on in my life right now and I felt so frustrated. It felt good to cry, but I was so emotionally drained today. I keep telling God that I'm going to leave all this stress, these troubles at the foot of the cross, but I have a knack for taking them back and trying to fix everything on my own. I worry too much which causes overthinking. Trust me if you need some worrying done, just let me know I'll worry enough for you and I put together.

I really miss my girls. I was thinking how fun it would be to go trick or treating with them this yr. I remember the first yr I went with B 4 yrs ago. Those Scream masks were all the rage and to get her not to be scared of the kids wearing them, I taught her to say "Wasss uuuuupppp" and told her to say it to anyone wearing that mask. Oh man was that funny. The last time I went she was Sleeping Beauty and she wore these dress shoes that hurt her feet. She got about 3 feet from the house and needed to go back for her tennis shoes. Those were the days when I could be a close-by Auntie. I wish Disney would hire my BIL and pay for them to move back here.

Whew, I sound really depressed, but I'm not. I'm actually happy, just bummed that I now have to leave the computer to go put the laundry in the dryer. Ugh I hate doing laundry

Weird

My newer posts aren't showing up.....so I guess this is a test post......can anyone hear me? Does anyone really read this thing?

WOW!!!!!

I recently received an email from someone ona Youth Ministry board who saw my blog. They mentioned that I had a lot of bad language in my blog. Well, from time to time I blow off steam and a few words, unlady-like as they are fly out. I'll try to be tetter about my use of language.....I'm only human

"It's been a while"

I love that song. Shean sang it at Karaoke the other night. He did a darn good job. I got so irritated with all the stress in my life last week so I took off on Friday morning and headed to Northern CA. Spent some time with Shean(Who I hadn't seen in 4 yrs) and my friends in San Francisco. What a blast that was. Although, I admit, the drive home wasn't fun. I realized how much I missed having friends and leaving was tough...I admit it, I'm a whimp, and I cried. With the full moon out I KNEW I would have a heck of a day and I did. I was so crabby last night, I didn't sleep, and I was crabby most of the day. I had about 10 phone calls from parents who had received letters telling them when their kid would have Confirmation class and they called to say it wasn't going to work so could I move them to another day. It's crazy because on Weds nights I now have 30 kids in both of my confirmation 2 classes, and that won't fly. So I am praying that we will find another teacher and fast. I know God won't let me down. Since I had a bad day today, I went shopping. I got some shoes, and a cute top, and a crockpot, and a few other things that made me happy and made my day worthwhile. Shopping is always such a great thing. Though, WalMart in Chino Hills did not have the shower curtain I wanted. I was soooo mad, so I am off to the WalMart I don't like in a few days to get the curtain. Linens and Things had these CUTE frames that would look good in my living room, so I am going to go eventually and get them. Then I'll get my brother to come over and hang them because I will do it crooked. My nephew's birthday is coming soon and I promised to take him to see "A Shark's Tale" since he sat through "Princess Diaries 2" Man, I'm a good Aunt

Things that annoy me

1) The Bachelor-This show is STUPID!!!! First off they chose the wrong guy. This Byron guy is greasy and sleazy. It's the perfect show for him because these women are so damn catty. It's probably better that Jay was sent on his merry way. These women are DUMB. One of them said "I chose Jay but Bryon won" Basically she was saying she was more attracted to Jay, but she would change gears all of a sudden and go after Byron..>WTF??? That is so screwed. Nice message we are sending to single women all over the US.

2) The Elephant Man- I have a new upstairs neighbor and he stomps all the over the freaking place. It's like he has to be moving around the house all the time and he cannot step lightly. Every step is a stomp. When he comes down the stairs, I SWEAR they are going to fall down. He goes out onto the patio 500 times a night. I've banged the broom on the ceiling to no avail. He walks so hard that my windows rattle. So I have named him Elephant Man. He's so freaking annoying.

3) UPS Early AM delivery-this is the worst thing ever. Thomas had a package delivered to me Early AM...he sent me a copy of our wedding video. WTF for??? I think he's hoping I will watch it and want to run back to him....NOT!!! I DID watch it and I was sick to my stomach the whole time. I can't believe I made such a dumb mistake. It's like I was brainwashed and I never saw it coming. HAHAHA, he wasted money for nothing. I'm not going back to him. I love my life

4) Have I mentioned the Elephant Man??? My gosh, he's going to come through the roof tonight!!!

I think that's enough for tonights rant..........

I thanked him

I think I threw a curve ball at Fr. Michael.

I had a meeting with 3 kids who are starting a Catholic Club at their school. I am so excited for them. They have a great plan and a great foundation to go with. We talked about readings that they were doing (readings of the day) and I helped them to better understand the scriptures they had. It turned out to be a great meeting and I am so proud of them.

On my way out of the church, after dropping off some books to C, the youth who is spear heading the group, Fr was walking from one bldg to another and he told me to have a good night, lock my doors when I am driving and God BLess. I told him I needed to lock up a few doors. He said he'd get it for me and to just go home and relax. As I was walking to my car, I just said "Thank you for my job Fr......I love it" I think he was a bit shocked to hear that. But, I really love my job and I am glad they chose me.

Finally she posts!!!

After a long weekend, I am finally posting. I have no clue why I have not posted. There has been alot going on in my life, so there is no reason not to. I have been working everyday and have not had a day off in a while. Luckily Fr. comes in and tells me to go home. I can't argue with the man, so I do. This weekend I get a 3 day weekend, so YAY ME!!! Last Saturday I went to a Karaoke bar with two friends. It was so funny because Mike is not the type of person that I would ever picture being up there singing karaoke but he did. He sang Machinehead and Gliserine. I love both those songs. Renata didn't sing. We just watched all the crazy drunk people and shared a Smirnoff Green Apple thing. Whoa, those things are sour!!!! I was too chicken to sing, so I just did some people watching, but as soon as the lesbiens walked in, that people watching was held to a minimum. Now, if that is the life someone chooses for themselves, that is fine. I just don't want to see them "doing it" on pool tables. Ok, they weren't actually doing it, but close enough. I'm going back with them this Saturday. They promised me pizza from the pizza place next door. The owners(of the pizza place next door) son stopped by after he went to a wedding last week...whoa...I love a guy in a tux!!! I really am being good, I promise!!! I got a package from T today (at the god awful hour of 7:45am. In it? Our wedding "video" No note, nothing else. I have no clue why he sent it. Maybe to try and get me to come running back to him. He's loosing control...OMG the horror!!! LOL

It's good to be loved

I don't hve enough fingers and toes to count how many blessings I have. I know I have many. When I think I am furthest from God, He steers me in the right direction, to people who will help me get back on track. This is what happened 3 yrs ago when , due to my sister's bugging and hounding me, I went to Cursillo. For my non Catholic viewers, Cursillo is a movement of the Church which by means of its own method makes it possible for people to live what is fundamental for being a Christian, and to live it together; it helps people discover and fulfill their personal vocations, and it promotes the creation of core groups of Christians who leaven their environments with the Gospel. (Thanks to the OC Cursillo website for this little "blurb")

Cursillo is much more than that to me...The people I have met through Cursillo have become my family and I am forever indebted to them for their Love, Grace, and kindness, and for showing me that no matter where I go, I am loved by God. We share a unique bond in the Catholic Church, such a great connection. The Blessed Eucharist. To us it is not a "symbol": it IS. True presence my friends.....body and blood. I share the beauty of this sacrifice not only with them, but with my friends in whom I have daily contact (sometimes we don't even know it)...it's called being the face of Christ. A kind gesture, a loving hug, a laugh, an encouraging word. A simple, yet needed prayer. Even something so simple as "I'm sorry you had a bad day today, is there anything I can do for you right now?" I try each day to be the loving face of Christ, though in all my own humanity I fail and find myself kneeling at the foot of the cross to beg forgivness. In all my shortcomings, He continues to bless me with love, Friends, faith, Grace.........

Of course, outside of Church life, whether it be Cursillo or my wonderful Parish Community, I have a multitude of friends who show they love me. For example, last night I told you about Karen and the CD's. How great a love for a friend? Julie, now, she is like my sister. The bond of friendship we have is inexplicable. She is the one person I can totally be myself around, and no matter HOW DUMB I may act (even when drooling over hot guys) she loves me, calls me a dork and always laughs with me. Michelle is my rock, so to speak. When I am having trouble with something in my life, she listens to what is going on, offers support and most of all she's 100% honest and isn't afraid to tell me I screwed up. I need that from time to time, because I get so wrapped up in what Katie wants for Katie's world. Each person in my life serves a very important purpose. It could be to call me at 2am to say "hi, I'm tired, I love you" or to email me and tell me they miss seeing pictures of the girls and hearing stories about them. It could be to be the shoulder I cry on, or the friend I'm crazy and silly with. God puts them there at that moment for a specific purpose.......They have a purpose, they are an intricate part of the path in which I walk on that will ultimatly lead me to the one thing I desire most in this world......happiness and fulfillment in Heaven. The funny thing is, some of them are not Catholic, not Christian, not religious, etc. It doesn't matter they are fulfilling THE purpose that they were meant to fill. That is to be the eyes, ears, hands, feet of Christ. I love my family and friends more than they will ever know. And though I know this journey will be tough as time goes by, I know they will always be there for me.......I love you!!!! Thanks!!! (BTW, Steve, You rock, I love you Man!!!!!!)

My day......if anyone is reading

I don't think anyone but Karen reads this :::waving to Karen as I order toffee-ettes for her:::::
Karen Rocks, she has burned 2 CD's for me to use for work!!! She endured my endless emails of LISTS of songs. Last nights list was ridiculous. She informed me that the CD's are done and now I get a "personal" CD. I think I chose 3 songs and she's going to add some of her faves that she says I need to hear. So, She gets See's Candy for being so great!!! (you two can have See's delivered, just do something great for me !!!! LOL)

We are in the process of raising 4 million dollars to build a new church at work. The design is really pretty!!! Well, we're at 1 million so far. One of our big fund raisers is a car raffle. My car was delivered today. It is a silver 2004 BMW. I don't know the model, I only know it is beautiful and I will look good in it. Fr. got a kick out of my saying it was mine. I have worked almost 42 hrs this week, so I only have to go in for 3 hours tomorrow. Just to help set up for a reception this weekend. In the evening, I am off to Glendora for a Cursillo gathering. Saturday morning I am driving to downtown L.A. for an orientation (8 hours long) and then my friend Renata and her bf Mike asked me to go to Karaoke with them. I doubt I'll sing though.

Ahhh, I think I am finally ready for sleep. My friend, Hyphen's parents are visiting her so I better send a couple of pics of my girls to her. Her mother LOVES my nieces.

Ok, back from tissue land

Part 2: So that is the song, these kids are too far away for me to have all the Bethany, Michelle and Auntie Katie time that I want to have. Don't get me wrong, I love having time with my nephews (they love football, we go to games, they think I'm cool because I buy cotton candy. It all works out). It's just different with the girls. We can play barbies and make believe. They love to give me hugs and kisses (you'd never get that from the boys!!!! Cause girls are yucky to them and I AM a girl you know). I love being an Aunt, I just hate the distance between my nieces and I. So Ivan is headed their way tomorrow. Bethany is "Nervous and frightened" but happy to have 3 days off from school (go figure). I asked her what she is frightened of and she says "Well, I am used to thunderstorms, lightening storms and earthquakes, not hurricanes" I laughed to myself and thought Earthquakes are far scarier, but she is a kid and what scares her scares me. I want so badly to be there to protect them fromt he winds and rain that will make Michelle hide her face. From the sounds that will bring the saddest look of fear to Bethany. Yet all I can do is sit here and pray. "Hail Mary full of grace the Lord is with thee........" If there is a Patron Saint of Weather, I'll be asking him/her to interceede for me the next few days. I have to admit I was secretly hoping to hear from my family telling me they were coming to CA for a few days. I'd much rather that than them wait out the storm at home, but I know that would not be possible for them. A nice thought though. I'd love to show the girls off at work and have them over for a sleepover. And so the praying begins.....for my babies, for my sister and BIL......and for Ivan to calm down!!!! God bless them and keep them safe and Angels surround them!!! Always

My sister and her family live in Alabama, which is something I do not like. not solely because of Hurricane Ivan that is threatening the entire state, but because she took the two most important people in my life, Bethany and Michelle (ages 7 & 2) over 2000 miles away from me!!! Most of my friends who read this blog will know the story but for those of you who don't. My entire universe revolves around these two. I live for the sole purpose of making them laugh, smile, sing, tell silly jokes, make silly faces, say silly things. The list is endless. I would lay down my life for these two. I can't imagine even on milisecond without them in my life. There is a song by Michael W. Smith that pretty much sums it up (I can't hit enter to start a new paragraph here so bear with me: If they were to write about/the story of my life/ they would have to mention you/with every page they write/there's another side to every story told. If I were the ocean/you would be the shore/and one without the other one/would be needeing something more/we are the shadow and the light. Always love me/never leave me now/now you are the other side of me. I have known the emptiness of feeling out of touch/and living life without you here/would be living half as much/Cause I've a need that only you can fill. If Love were mathiatical/you'd understand the sum/ to the hearts equation/where one and one makes one/and lonely equals me minus you.....to be continued, because I need a tissue now

It's 2am.....

I just finished watching "Sense and Sesibility". I had never seen it, and had always wanted to. The great thing about living in this place is I can watch what I want, when I want and I won't be made fun of or told I am "weird". Well, we already knew I was weird didn't we?

Halfway through the movie, or maybe 3/4 of the way I got a phone call. It was nice to hear the voice on the other end. I realized one thing tonight. Of all the blessings I have, I am very blessed to still have friends who care. Friends who, after a long day at work will pick up the phone at an ungodly hour and call. Who will listen to you ramble about nothing and not get annoyed because you're talking too much. Friends who will listen to you talk about work, when they don't share the same intrest/passion for what you do for a living, who will offer advice or really see your point of view on a subject, as you sit there in amazement at their "serious side" (yes, said friend LOVES to joke, but the serious side is pretty nice!!!). A friend who will laugh with you and comfort you (as much as they can despite a 300 mile distance). It's been over a year since I have had my true friends in my life. I have to admit, it's as if time had not passed, yet I know that there have been many late night calls (or IM's), and lots of laughter I've missed. There have been friends who have moved away (Julie :*( ), and friends whom I can't find (Dusty). Friends who have welcomed me with open arms (Karen, Hyphen, Michelle, Marikay, Shean, just to name a few). I once was told that these people did not really care, that they were not true friends, and for a split second I almost believed that. I know now, that couldn't be further from the truth.

I've had my share of pity parties over the last few days, and within the last day or two I have really felt that I am where I belong, among friends I belong with. This isn't to say that the pain is forever vanished from my head or my heart, but it gives me something to wake up to with a smile on my face. I'm where I need to be. Working in a job I LOVE (and if being paid "poverty pay" as someone once said is all this job has to offer, then I will die a happy poor woman), stressing over bills (comes with the territory), being able to stay up until 2 am and sleeping till whenever I damn well feel like it, and most of all hearing an honest to God "I love you" on the other end of the phone......I'm grateful for what little I have, but mostly I am grateful for all that I have regained.

Fight On!!!!!

It feels so good to root for USC again. Over the last yr. my love for USC has been met with put downs and an avid HATE for "anything L.A." So loving USC and the Angels was looked down upon. Freeeeedoooooooommmm!!!!! Tonight I went to the USC vs Colorado State game. We blew them out 49-0!!!! It was my first time at the L.A. Coliseum (Site of the 1984 Olympics) and my first time at a football game with my nephews. We had a blast!!!!! They even lit the torch during the 4th quarter (no, not my nephews)....very cool. Prior to the game, we walked around the campus, littered with beer bottles, trash etc from students partying before the game, and made our way to the bookstore. I bought my first ever USC t-shirt and I think the next time I have to see Thomas (to sign tax papers) I'm going to wear it just to piss him off. The USC campus is so incredibly huge and absolutley gorgeous. It's just too bad it's in a bad, crime ridden, gross city such as L.A. I have grown up in So. Cal and I personally do not see what everyone finds so fascinating about Los Angeles. It's gross, congested, and unsafe.

At any rate, the guys played exceptionally well and I had a blast!!!! Because parking is so bad in the area we had to park at Staples Center (Home of the Lakers and Kings) and ride the shuttle to the Coliseum. After the game we decided we didn't want to wait 45 mins for the shuttle and WALKED 4.99 miles from the staduim to Staples. Man was that tiring. I think I've done enough walking to last me a yr. I'm a wimp, sorry. Though I have walked greater distances. I walked from Sears Tower to Navy Pier a few years ago in Chicago. But at least Chicago is a nicer city!!!! I loved visiting there, but didn't love the shin splints I had the next few days afterwards.

Getting back to my first sentence, rooting for USC is finally fun again. I still have the tune of the fight song stuck in my head. I am almost tempted to download it to my cell phone.

I hope they go all the way, again, this year. It would be great to have back to back National Championships. I am personally rooting for Matt Leinart for the Heisman this yr.(Hey he's a Mater Dei Alum, THE Catholic HS in "the OC", which means he's a good Catholic boy!!! Of course I'm rooting for him!!!!) He was incredible tonight!!! Almost scored a touchdown a couple times!!!! If he isn't a first round pick this yr for the NFL draft, I'd be shocked. Ah, he even has his own blog. Seriously I just found it online:

http://www.mattleinartblog.com

Kind of fun to look at. He has all sorts of pics and what not and it seems he really does do the entries!!!! Anyway, that's enough of me cramming USC down everyone's throats for one evening!!! But hey....they are a pretty damn good team!!

YAY Go USC!!!!!!!!! Fight on!!!!

I still got it!!!!!

After being away from the Church for a year I thought I had really lost touch with my faith and mostly with God. I went into my job nervous and doubtful that I would fulfill the needs and hopes of my superiors. With some confidence in myself and full trust in God.....I took on the challlenge before me.

Sunday I have my second meeting with the kids. I have decided to really focus this meeting on setting objectives/goals and an eventual plan. One that won't happen over night but will be a gradual process to build on the current foundation of Youth Ministry at St. Lorenzo Ruiz. I'm not a miracle worker, so I cannot promise them the universe. I can promise to work hard to foster and nurture their faith formation and development in the Parish Community. I also want to work with them on team work and recognizing their gifts, as well as affirming them and them affirming one another. One of the things I want to do is a meditation. I had a rough outline of one that we had done at St. Matthew's, during an Amazing Encounter (retreat) and decided to write it in my own words (since I had not gotten a copy from Ramie). I did this at St. John Neumann, used it on retreat and thought I had saved it to one of the disks I had. When I pulled it up on Word at the office today I noticed I only had the beginning. I panicked. I came home, went to the store(I loathe WalMart in La Puente) and came back only to procrastinate and make up excuses for not writing this meditation again. I went online and chatted with Karen, posted on a scrapbooking messageboard, and finally got offline, rescued the cats from jumping over the patio wall, and relaxed. I listened to a few Michael W. Smith songs, as well as "My Heart Will Go On". I really put myself in a pretty deep prayerful mode. One I hadn't seen in a while....a long while. Then I sat at the computer. I opened Word and waited for God to speak through me......nah, nothing yet, so I played a few games of solitaire. Finally......I knew it was time. I began to type and type and type. Pausing only for a few moments to gather the endless stream of thoughts. When I was finished,I re-read it as if I were reading it to the kids, made a couple of changes and let out a HUGE thank you. I felt a sense of relief, a sense that I am where God needs me to be. I am doing his work.........It's amazing when one allows God to speak freely through them!!!

God is Good

Where were you?

As we approach the 3 yr anniversary of 9/11, the question above, will again be asked numerous times. I think for the rest of my life I will always remember where I was on that day. I had split from Robert the yr earlier and was living with my sister. She and her family had gone to Northern CA to visit her in laws and I was by myself at the house. I woke up to hear on the local radio station about the first plane, and then.....the next one hit. I was in shock. I didn't want to move. However, I knew if I didn't my supervisor would get on my butt (in her normal fashion) and be upset with me. I felt numb. I reluctantly got myself ready for work. As I was getting ready to leave, the first tower fell. I was glued to the radio, I was crying, praying the rosary. I wanted to get on a plane and go help. Though I knew that my knowledge and experience would not be enough to do much. I wanted to hug and comfort those who were terrified, the children of those who lost their lives. I felt such immense pain for them. As I was getting off the freeway, the second tower fell. For the first time since my dad died, I screamed at God "Why are you doing this?" I knew he wasn't doing it, but in my anger and pain, I did what every human being does...I questioned God. I stayed home that Friday, I lit candles in honor of the victims and their families and we kept them burning on the corner outside our house for months. Then I received this:
Meet Me in the Stairwell
You say you will never forget where you wereWhen you heard the news on September 11, 2001I was on the 110th floor in a smoke filled roomWith a man who called his wife to say "GoodBye,"I held his fingers steady as he dialedI gave him the peace to say"Honey, I am not going to make itBut it is OK, I am ready to go"I was with his wife when he calledAs she fed breakfast to their childrenI held her up, as she tried to understand his wordsAnd as she realized he wasn't coming home that night
I was in the stairwell of the 23rd floorWhen a woman cried out to Me for help"I have been knocking on the door of your heart, for 50 yearsI said, "Of course I will show you the way homeOnly believe on Me now."
I was at the base of the building with the PriestMinistering to the injured and devastated soulsI took him home to tend to his Flock in HeavenHe heard my voice and answered
I was on all four of those planes, in every seat, with every prayerI was with the crew as they were overtakenI was in the very hearts of the believers thereComforting and assuring them that their faith has saved them
I was in Texas, Kansas, LondonI was standing next to you, when you heard the terrible newsDid you sense Me?
I want you to know that I saw every faceI knew every name, though not all know MeSome met me for the first time on the 86th floor
Some sought Me with their last breathSome couldn't hear Me calling to them, through the smoke and flames"Come to Me, this way, take My hand,"Some chose for the final time, to ignore Me, But I was there
I did not place you in the Tower that dayYou may not know why, but I doHowever, if you were there in that explosive moment in timeWould you have reached for Me?
September 11, 2001 was not the end of the journey for youBut someday your journey will endAnd I will be there for you as well
Seek Me now while I may be foundThen at any moment, you know you are "Ready To Go"I will be in the stairwell of your final moments
Remember, I Love You!
~Author Unknown

God Bless the families and God Bless America

I met the kids at work tonight. WOW!!! If any of you say I am loud ever again, I'm taking you to a leadership team meeting at my work. I think I need a hearing aid. The kids are so funny!!!! One of them (who's 19) is going to San Francisco this weekend is bringing me Ghiradelli chocolate, another one has a Disneyland ticket for me, and they all had tons of ideas for Youth ministry. What a crazy and loveable group. I am looking forward to working with these kids!!!!

Last night I had a great experience and a horrible experience.

I had a mandatory meeting at work about sexual abuse on children, recognizing the warning signs, being aware, taking action etc. There were about 65-70 of us there. Fr. Michael had dinner for us. Pizza and salad. For those of you who have worked in youth ministry, this is typacally know as Youth Ministry Special (I think I've eaten enough pizza's to turn into Pizza the Hut). One of the first things that the presenter told us were the statistics of child molestation. Then we watched a video. I almost threw up my dinner. It was heart wrenching hearing these kids talk about what they went through. I think we all know at least one person who has suffered through sexual abuse...I know 2!!!! I can't imagine anything like that happening to my nieces and neohews and if it did I think I would have to hurt someone very badly. I guess my point for posting about this is not to depress you or gross you out, but to just tell you all to be aware!!!! Be aware of the warning signs, of where your kids/grandkids/nieces/nephews are hanging out and who they are with (alot of times it is someone they know as opposed to a stranger), communicate, monitor programs and with all that we can do alot more prevention.

Now, what was the great experience? Yea I know, talk about jumping from one extreme to another!!! Last night after coming home from work, I was just drained but I needed to talk to someone. I just needed to vent about how I was feeling about the meeting. There is one person I know who would 1) be awake and willing to listen to me rant 2). cheer me up. So, I called Shean....he was at work!!!! ACK! Shean works at a bar 3 nights a week and he's in charge of the karaoke machine. Poor thing was pooped because he had put in 8 hours at his full time 5 day a week job already. I felt bad for him. Somehow, and this still boggles my mind, he's able to talk to me between songs and keep up with his job, and I always worry he's going to get into trouble for talking to me. I proceed to vent to him about the meeting and how it was gross, sad, depressing, etc. I think it made him sad too. So, in our usual fashion, we start teasing one another, joking and above all we laughed. HARD. Let me tell you that it's one thing to listen to drunk people singing karaoke live and another to hear it over a cell phone. I had told Shean a few days ago that my favorite song was "I'll Be" by Edwin McCain. I have loved this song from the moment I heard it on the radio. Now being the karaoke man, Shean sang that song last night while on the phone with me. If you have ever been to Niagra falls.......this paled in comparison. I just started crying!!! It was crazy. I think a lady who was drunk came up to him afterwards and said "You moved me" That comment turned tears to laughter. Great Job Shean!!!! His roommate also works at the bar. We chose a song for him to sing...he sang "Higher" by Creed. Don't get me wrong, Greg has a nice voice, but ask Julie, no one can sing it like Cesar does. :)

Time for Ty countdown...we are now down to 2 days until Ty is at DCA. I'm still debating going to DCA on Sat. I keep telling myself that I am going to Disneyland in November (I hope...as long as SOME PEOPLE make up their MINDS......and stop giving me the "We're moving" bit j/k). Disneyland in Nov is fine and dandy, but Ty won't be there. OMG......I met with one of my Jr. high teachers last night. He's not able to go to a mtg we have on Tuesday so we met early. He sees my Ty pic on my computer (I have one taped there) and asks if I like EMHE. I tell him yes and that I am going to marry Ty some day. While we were eating dinner, (I'm sitting with his wife and another mom of one of my leadership kids) Disneyland comes up. Bill says "Yea, Katie is going there on Saturday to meet her husband. She's going to marry Ty" I turned about 10 shades of red. Mary, Bill's wife then proceeded to warn me not to tell Bill anything cause he's a big blabber mouth. THAT made me laugh sooooo hard. I like working at this church.

Wow, in usual Katie fashion, I've let my lips run away with me. Until tonight, thank you and good night

Test...test

I've been trying since last night to post to my blog, but it hasn't worked. Before typing my long post, I'm just going to test this one out.

Ok, now that this is working

This morning I had a staff meeting. We met at a restaurant and thinking I'd be paying for my breakfast I stopped at the bank on the way. I needed quarters for laundry anyway...so... It turns out that Fr. paid for breakfast and I am now stuck with a 20 and still need quarters. Well, how convienient that there is a Home Goods Store across the street from the restaurant. Yes folks, I went shopping!!! I bought a Halloween candy dish and a kitchen towel (Fall theme) and got $3 in quarters.......the laundry is drying as we speak!!!! Hmmm, suddenly I can't hit enter to start a new paragraph on this thing....weird. Well now we are down to 3 days until Ty is at DCA. I am still debating whether to got to Disney in the morning on Sat and go to the Q&A or just save my money and just go to my nephews soccer game(s). I really want to see Ty, plus I could ride Tower of Terror. Going to Disney alone kind of sucks. It's not riding the rides alone, cause I could do that anytime. It's waiting in the lines alone that stinks. I was thinking of just getting an annual pass, but I have no one to go with :( Plus the last thing I need is to run into one of Thomas' customers (who has a pass an goes almost every weekend) and have him tell Thomas "guess who I saw at Disneyland" Well....for now that's all folks. I have to get to work in a little bit.

Having technical difficulties

This is attempt # 3 at posting on my blog. I don't know what is wrong. I keep getting the timed out error. Maybe I'm typing too much. For now I'll just post about my conversation with Thomas:

He called at 5:45am yesterday (grrrr) and said he would email me. Not wanting to keep checking my email all day I called him around 8ish. He asked "Are you happy with your job?" I said YES!!! He said "Are you happy with your living arrangement?" I said YES!!! "Are you doing ok?" I said YES!!! "Are you wearing your wedding ring?" I said NO!!! (he asked why and I explained that I was not sure how to explain it to the kids. I mean really how do you tell a bunch of teenagers that you met a man, married him 5 weeks later....and screwed up?) Then he asked "Well, are you out there?" I said WHAT? "Are you looking for someone?" HUH? I said NO!!! After a brief silence he asked "Are you happier now than you have been the last month or so?" I said YES!!! He said something about the writing being on the wall and then said "Have a nice life Catherine". After we hung up I felt a little sad, emabarassed and ashamed. I mean, how many times do I have to scew up here? Then I called a couple people (You know who you are and I love you and thank you for listening) and felt a sense of freedom and relief!!!!! YAY! I know there will be good days and bad days, but I love nthat I can jump in the car and go see friends I haven't seen in the last yr. I can email someone or have an IM conversation without worrying that someone is going to read it on the computers e drive. I can go to any website and not worry that he's going to check to see where I have been. Freedom my friends, freedom!!!! YAY

I'll post again later tonight

Ty in the flesh...coming Sat Sept 11

I could not believe my eyes when I saw it in the newspaper. The cast of Extreme makeover Home Edition is coming to DCA on Saturday!!!!! I HAVE TO GO. I must see Ty!!!! They will be doing a Q&A at 10:30am on Sat. I have a USC football game at 5pm...I think I can swing this. I really do!!!! I need to see Ty in the flesh

Today was really a good day. I went shopping at the mall in Brea, which might as well have been compared to life in hell. It was obnoxiously busy and children were screaming and people were walking slower than a snail. I wanted to get to specific stores and get out!!! I had to be at my brother's by 2:30pm for crying out loud!!! I went with the intention of buying jeans and a couple of shirts. Hoping to spend less than $50 since everyone was having big sales. But, I passed the Mac make-up store and all thoughts of clothing went out the window. I proudly walked out of Mac with $53 worth of studio fix powder and eye shadow...but I looked GOOOOOOD!!! LOL

I went to a BBQ with my brother's family and had a blast. Their friends have a rock pool complete with diving board and slide. Going down the slide with both my nephews at the same time was FUNNY!!! Watching my nephews do cannon balls off the diving board was darn near side splitting...all this fun and I left my camera at home :(. After we left we were back at my brothers house. Apparently his neighbor almost burned down the apt building. There was no fire damage or anything. He had put some ribs on to boil so he could BBQ them on his patio and he fell asleep. Ah, the smells coming from the apt downstairs were anything but pleasant. I feel sorry for the guy...he has cancer, and was probably wiped from all the surgery and treatment he's had lately.

I went to see some friends of mine in Glendora after that. They have the most enormous cat I've ever seen. He's so huge he makes my 17lb cats look thin!!!! Much to my utter surprise when I got home I had a message on the machine. I checked caller ID and saw that my friend, Shean, had called. He even left a message which was a HUGE shock. I wasn't expecting that at all. What a sweetie. That made my day!!!

This is probably the most fun Labor Day weekend I've had in years!!! YAY!!!! Now only a few more days until my life is complete and I see Ty (I hope)

I love BBQ's

I had a really fun day today. First and foremost I went to Mass. Well, let me rewind a few minutes. I stopped at Hollywood video to pick up Seabiscuit. My nephews have never seen the movie and I figured since I was going over there and we were BBQ'ing...why not. It's a GREAT movie!!!! Well, it felt like a race against time trying to go to the video store and make it to Mass in time. I get to New Releases and don't see the movie, I go to the drama section, still no movie. So I ask the guy who worked there for help. He takes me over to New releases and right in front of me. DUH!!! I felt like the blonde I really am. Needless to say I made it to Mass with 9 minutes to spare.

One rule I learned long ago, but have YET to follow is: Never go grocery shopping hungry. My brother told me all I needed to being today for our BBQ was Dr. Pepper. No problem, right? WRONG. I bought strawberries because I knew my nephews LOVE them. Plus, I bought chips and salsa!!! Oy vey!!! Oh and I bough cheese because I wanted nacho's. I get to my brothers and we start watching "Blue Collar Comedy Tour: the Movie" Let me tell you that is one funny show. I watched it yesterday but OMG the second time around...it's funnier. I realized that everyone in my family is a redneck....except me. Just kidding.

My brother is a HUGE NASCAR fan so the hype of the day was watching the race at 4pm. Now, I love football, baseball, tennis, but I am by far not the biggest NASCAR fan. WHAT is the big deal about watching cars race round and round a 2 mile track 250 times? And what is with all these points? Just too confusing. My brother and the boys HATE Jeff Gordon. So....I started cheering for him. My 7 yr old nephew immediately looked at me and said "Get out" and pointed at the door!!! I told him I'm taking the strawberries with me and he decided to let me stay. My SIL likes Dale Ernhardt Jr. So we kept calling him her boyfriend. I told my nephew that his mom was going to marry him. He got really excited. So, I said wait, what are we going to do with your dad? He said "Kick him out" I said "Well then I won't be your Aunt anymore" He said "We're only kicking my dad out of the house, we can still come visit you" I know he was joking, and it was sooooo funny. He and his brother both have a plan for me.....I'm going to marry David Eckstein of the Angels so they can go to Angel games for free forever. It;s a good thing X is cute I guess.

After we BBQ'ed and my brother really started to get into the race, we headed for the pool. I had never been swimming with my nephews. It was soooooooo much fun. So much fun in fact that my nephew asked me to go with them to their friends house to swim tomorrow afternoon. The best part WE'RE BBQ'ing!!!! I love BBQ'ed hot dogs and I love the smell of BBQ's.....I think because they bring back such great memories of when I was growing up and we'd go to our family friends to BBQ. I'd swim all day, eat drink tons of soda and my dad and his friends would play poker into the wee hours of the morning. Those were the days. The son of our family friend would come home from college and to kill time while our families would be gambling their nickels and quarters (or as they say in New England "Qwahtah's"), we'd go to Shakey's, the movies, and sometimes of my sister could get us in, we'd got to Disneyland...or we'd "night swim" Good times, good times.

OH!!! The best part of today??? I found out I am going to a USC football game at the L.A. Memorial coliseum!!! Whoooo hoooooooooo GO TROJANS!!!!!! It will be my Nephews, my brother and I. My SIL gets the day to herself. She's pretty excited. I can't wait!!! I LOVE USC. Plus we get to walk around the Campus and I'm taking TONS of pictures of the school I always dreamed of going to....but never did. YAY YAY YAY I can't wait!!!!

So I am off to enjoy one more BBQ and have fun swimming with my nephews tomorrow!!!! Life is pretty good!!!!

In the Beginning

I'm not sure why I created this blog, or even how often I'll keep up with it. I'm going to try. I need a place to vent and to get out all the frustrations of life. Besides, with my current job and all the things I'll experience, this should be fun!!!! Whomever reads this can look forward to stories of my nieces, frustrations with the breakdown of my marriage, funny friendship stories, and what not. Hey now that I think of it...this won't be too bad. I'll be like a high tech Doogie Howser. I used to love that show!!!! In fact Doogie was on Pyramid (probably a repeat) the other night and I was so happy to see him. Then again, I've been happy to see alot of men lately. Ty Pennington? Lord have mercy on him. He's a major hottie. I started watching Spiderman last night and could not get over how cute Tobey MacGuire is, in a dorky sort of way. I haven't talked to anyone about how hot I think certain famous guys are due to the fact that someone would have had a coniption (sp?) fit if he knew I had even had one single thought like that. Dork.

I promise to post about my exciting weekend as it rolls along. SO far I've bought a vacuum cleaner...joyous times here huh? I was supposed to drive to Sacramento to see a friend of mine (another hottie to add to the top of the hottie list) as well as my Mom. Those plans, though very last minute, fell through. Note to self: don't plan last minute things like that anymore. My brother is having me over for a BBQ tomorrow and I am going to have to do traffic school online. So this should all make for an interesting read!!!!

KitKat......out...oh Lord I've watched too much American Idol!!!